第一時(shí)間:名師丁曉鐘南京大學(xué)四級(jí)演講講義(2)

太陽(yáng)葵新伍：

我感覺(jué)我的作文有點(diǎn)像trash........不過(guò)我不怕現(xiàn)眼，就因?yàn)椴畈刨N出來(lái)改進(jìn)^_^！

有很多不錯(cuò)的詞匯一到寫(xiě)作的時(shí)候才發(fā)現(xiàn)，會(huì)說(shuō)會(huì)看卻不會(huì)寫(xiě)。。。。。。。

前幾次4級(jí)都是差2～3分就過(guò)了，是不是出在作文上呢

希望老師指點(diǎn)，使我進(jìn)步

Dear sir:

I'm so excited and pleased that you give me a chance to wrie to you.

As a normal people in the world,I have been concerning he peace of the world all the days.I realize that some place on earth are peaceful,developed and prosperous.But in some countries,a great number of people are still suffering from wars,disastersand disease,like Iran and Iraq.Many people were killed and more and more children lost their home and parents.The god treat his people is not fairly,I guess.

At the end of my letter,dear sir,I expect you and your organization may do more good things for your people,for the children and for the whole world.

yours S.J

錯(cuò)誤：

1. I'm so excited and pleased that you give me a chance to wrie to you. / I am so honored to write to you.

2. As a normal people in the world / As an average people in the world

3. I have been concerning he peace of the world / I am concerned with the peace of the world.

4. some place / some places

5. suffering from wars, disasters and disease / … diseases

6. The god treat his people is not fairly / God treat his people unfairly

半只耳：

Dear Mr. Annan

I'm a college student in China. As I know, the situation of the world is very complicated.And it has been shown that war never stops in the past 10 years. Undoubtedly, most people love peace. But for the reason that no one person or country can bear being deprived of its own economical and political benefits. So the war breaks out. And what the war brings is chaos and poverty. Like in Iraq, people wherever he comes from meets danger everyday, meanwhile, many residents there are still homeless.

Sadly, in my view,the war will never stop unless the Union State play an more important role in the adjustment of many states.Of course, it is the easier said than done. But I believe that if the Union State conduct more lawful rights than before amd today, the situation of the world may be not as worse as today's.

I'm looking forward to your reply.

Best regards.

sincerely yours

James

麻煩丁老師指導(dǎo)一下，謝謝哦。

錯(cuò)誤：

1. But for the reason that no one person or country can bear being deprived of its own economical and political benefits. 意思表達(dá)不清楚。/ economic and political ….

2. , meanwhile, many residents there are still homeless. / . Meanwhile,

3. the Union State / the UN

4. it is the easier said than done. / it is easier said than done.