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 四級(jí)寫作經(jīng)典范文及點(diǎn)評(píng):找尋寶藏
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四級(jí)寫作經(jīng)典范文及點(diǎn)評(píng):找尋寶藏
http://1glr.cn 來(lái)源:北文學(xué)!↑c(diǎn)擊: 更新:2007-12-6 15:28:09

  每個(gè)人的潛力就像是等待挖掘的寶藏,而只有你自己才能找到寶藏的位置。潛力的發(fā)掘,在于打破自身局限性而創(chuàng)造無(wú)限的可能。相信自己,沖破局限,找到屬于你的寶藏吧!

  Search Your Own Treasure

  Look up to the heavens and imagine the stars and planets are sparkling jewels dancing across the night sky. Your potential is like those jewels with a dazzling array of facets. Put another way, your human potential is virtually unlimited.①

  Problems arise from a perspective that “potential is a taboo or code word for failure.” It is for fear of failure that we are sometimes afraid to try new things. Realizing that we will not become an instant expert, we sometimes choose to cop out and not even make an attempt to be or try something new.② Perhaps worse yet, sometimes perfunctory efforts are made, unsatisfactory results are obtained, and an “I knew I couldn’t do it and I know I can’t do it” attitude is reinforced and seemingly justified.

  Refresh yourself from the perspective that so-called “mistakes” do not constitute failure; they are only new lessons to be learned. Failure is really giving up and quitting, as juxtaposed to persevering and persisting. There is universal law that states, “Practice precedes excellence.” Myth and history are filled with stories of individuals who had struggled against all odds and obstacles and just kept after what they truly wanted until they reached their goals successfully.

  Naturally, we all have our limitations, and prudence dictates that we respect them. However, wisdom encourages us to stretch beyond and transcend our limitations. Keep going on,your treasure is waiting for you.

 。236 words]

  行文點(diǎn)評(píng)

  本文按照總分總的順序進(jìn)行闡述。開篇引出主題,第二段和第三段分別從正反兩方面論述,思維的局限性對(duì)人們發(fā)掘潛能,走向成功所帶來(lái)的不同影響。最后一段進(jìn)行總結(jié),第一句話以退為進(jìn),先承認(rèn)人的局限性。然后呼吁人們突破局限,發(fā)掘潛能。特別是最后一句的點(diǎn)睛之筆,呼應(yīng)首段,點(diǎn)明主題。

  文章開篇意境優(yōu)美,使讀者以一種很平和的心態(tài)來(lái)品讀文章,隨后通過(guò)比喻將潛能的無(wú)限性,也就是文章的主題引入。讓人不覺突兀,而且興趣有加。

  好文妙譯

  找尋寶藏

  抬首仰望天空,想象一下,日月星辰仿佛是夜空中閃爍跳躍的寶石。而你的潛能就像那些各個(gè)鉆面上閃爍著眩目光彩的寶石一般。換句話說(shuō),你的潛力實(shí)際上是無(wú)窮無(wú)盡的。

  這種“潛力是一種禁忌或失敗的代名詞”的觀點(diǎn),很容易出現(xiàn)問(wèn)題。而正因?yàn)楹ε率。沟梦覀冇袝r(shí)不敢去嘗試新生事物。由于意識(shí)到自己不能馬上成為行家里手,有時(shí)我們就選擇了臨陣逃脫,甚至連試一下新事物都不愿意。也許更糟糕的是,有時(shí)我們會(huì)敷衍了事,結(jié)果自然差強(qiáng)人意,而這樣,就會(huì)加強(qiáng)并使這種“我早知道我不行,我知道我干不了”的觀點(diǎn)看起來(lái)還挺有道理。

  振作起來(lái),那些所謂的“錯(cuò)誤”并不是失;它們只不過(guò)是你需要吸取的新的教訓(xùn)罷了。真正的失敗是“放棄”或“舍棄”,這和“堅(jiān)忍不拔”或“堅(jiān)持不懈”正好相反——“成功需要苦練”是一條普適的法則。不管是在神話故事還是在歷史當(dāng)中,到處可見這樣的人物:他們追求自己的理想,努力和困阻抗?fàn),不勝利達(dá)到目的,決不罷休。

  我們都有自己的局限性,這是很自然的。而且出于謹(jǐn)慎,我們還非常重視這些局限性。但是智慧卻鼓勵(lì)我們跨出并超越我們自身的局限性。繼續(xù)前進(jìn)吧,你的寶藏在等待著你。

  詞匯斟酌

  sparkle v. 發(fā)光,閃爍

  dazzling a. 令人眼花繚亂的,耀眼的

  array n. 展示,陳列

  facet n. 面,刻面,平面

  taboo n. 禁忌

  perfunctory a. 馬馬虎虎的,敷衍

  juxtapose vt. 并排,并置

  persevering a. 堅(jiān)韌的,不屈不撓的

  odds n. 不平等,差異,可能性

  prudence n. 審慎

  佳句臨摹

 、佟咀⑨尅縫ut another way換句話說(shuō)

  【臨摹】He soon found what he did had already been done by others,put another way, he was wasting his time. 他很快發(fā)現(xiàn)他所做的事情是別人已經(jīng)做過(guò)的。換句話說(shuō),他在浪費(fèi)自己的時(shí)間。

  ②【注釋】cop out 是一個(gè)含有貶義的俚語(yǔ),意思是逃避、推諉、臨陣退縮。

  【臨摹】Don’t try to cop out of it by telling me you’re too busy!別告訴我你太忙來(lái)推脫責(zé)任。

  思如泉涌

  Once we stop growing, our end is near.一旦我們停止成長(zhǎng),那么我們的末日也就為時(shí)不遠(yuǎn)了。

  Wonders are many, and nothing is more wonderful than man.天下奇跡無(wú)數(shù),卻無(wú)一比人更奇妙。

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