2010年6月大學(xué)英語六級寫作經(jīng)典范文及點評

　　大學(xué)英語六級寫作經(jīng)典范文及點評

　　大學(xué)生自我創(chuàng)業(yè)已經(jīng)不是一個新鮮的話題了。那么自我創(chuàng)業(yè)有何利，又有何弊呢?看過本文之后你就知道了�；蛟S這對面臨畢業(yè)的你還是個不小的幫助呢!

　　Self employment

　　Self employment could bring many advantages. One of the advantages of being self-employed is that the profit the business makes belongs to the owner. If the self-employed person succeeds in business, he has the chance to earn a great deal of money. The profit earned is the reward for the owner’s effort, ability and creativity. Thus, a second advantage is that a person’s intelligence and abilities have a direct effect on the earnings. A third advantage of being self-employed is that a person can control his working hours. While not all self-employed people are completely free, most of them have more control over this area than the salaried people.

　　However, being self-employed is not without problems. First, being one’s own boss places the responsibility directly on that individual shoulders. Everyone has some weaknesses in a certain aspects. These weaknesses will affect how successful a self-employed person is. Second, though the self-employed can earn considerable profits with a successful business, losses can force them out of business and sometimes, place them in debt. A third disadvantage concerns income security. Self-employed people have no guaranteed wage. Their earnings can vary greatly, depending on business conditions. Salaried people, however, can generally count on continued earnings. In addition, salaried people often enjoy fringe benefits that mean greater peace of mind. One of these benefits may be insurance paid for by the employer that continues the employee’s salary in the event of sickness or accident while many self-employed people do not have such protection①.

　　[253 words]

　　行文點評

　　文章結(jié)構(gòu)簡單明了。第一段闡述了自我創(chuàng)業(yè)的3個好處。第二段分析了自我創(chuàng)業(yè)所存在的問題。

　　兩段中“first, second, third”的使用，不僅使文章在句式上顯得條理分明，更在內(nèi)容上體現(xiàn)了連貫性。

　　好文妙譯

　　自我創(chuàng)業(yè)

　　自我創(chuàng)業(yè)的好處之一是商業(yè)利潤歸創(chuàng)業(yè)者所有。如果創(chuàng)業(yè)者生意成功，他有可能掙很多錢。這些利潤是對創(chuàng)業(yè)者努力、能力和創(chuàng)造力的回報。因此，自我創(chuàng)業(yè)的第二個好處是一個人的才智和能力直接反映在收入上。自我創(chuàng)業(yè)的第三個優(yōu)勢是自己做老板能夠支配自己的工作時間。雖然不是所有的創(chuàng)業(yè)者都有完全的自由，但是相對于工薪族來說，他們大多數(shù)人在這方面擁有更多的自主權(quán)。

　　但是，自我創(chuàng)業(yè)并不是一帆風(fēng)順的事。首先，做自己的老板把責(zé)任直接放到了個人的肩上。每個人在某些方面都會有一些弱點，而這些弱點會對創(chuàng)業(yè)者的成功產(chǎn)生影響。其次，自己做老板時，雖然生意成功會帶來很大的盈利，但是一旦失敗就可能造成破產(chǎn)，有時甚至?xí)��?fù)債累累。第三個弊端涉及收入的穩(wěn)定性。創(chuàng)業(yè)者沒有穩(wěn)定的工資。依據(jù)生意的狀況，他們的收入浮動很大。而工薪族通�？梢砸揽砍掷m(xù)穩(wěn)定的工資。此外，他們通�？梢韵硎苤�額外福利，這意味著他們的心態(tài)可以更加的平和。其中一項福利就是由雇主為雇員支付保險，以保障他們在生病或遇到意外的情況下還能繼續(xù)領(lǐng)到工資。相比之下，很多創(chuàng)業(yè)者就沒有這種保障了。

　　詞匯斟酌

　　��in debt 負(fù)債

　　��count on 指望，依靠

　　��fringe a.附加的，額外的;邊緣的

　　佳句臨摹

　�、佟咀⑨尅縤n the event of sth萬一;倘若

　　【臨摹】In the event of his death Shelia will inherit the money.一旦他故去，希拉就會繼承這筆錢。

　　思如泉涌

　　Something attempted, something done. 有嘗試就會有收獲。

　　Actions speak louder than words. 行動勝于語言。

　　有些人并非特別聰明，卻能得到大家的認(rèn)可和支持。我們說這些人有個人魅力。個人魅力不僅源于聰明、誠實等優(yōu)秀品質(zhì)，還源于與他人交往時的態(tài)度和技巧。

　　Communicating a Sense of Personal Power

　　Communicating a sense of personal power comes from a belief that you can reach your goals in your own way. Powerful people give others power and encourage others to express themselves openly. You communicate a sense of personal power by developing these traits:

　　Authority

　　Authority is inner confidence — a trust in your skills and abilities. It comes from the inside, from an attitude of “I can do that”. “I deserve success”.This attitude radiates outward as you assert your right, honestly ask for what you want and need, and develop a willingness to give to others and yourself.

　　Being self-assured

　　Self-assured behavior is active, direct, and honest. It communicates an impression of self-respect and respect for others.By being self-assured, we view our wants, needs, and rights as equal with those of others. A self-assured person wins by influencing, listening, and negotiating so that other people choose to cooperate willingly.

　　Accessibility

　　The powerful person is a master net worker. Good networking increases your visibility and gives you a valuable circle of people from whom you can give and receive support and information. Imagine yourself as the center of a wheel surrounded by spokes of contacts.

　　Image

　　You communicate power through your image. Do you project an image consistent with strong leadership①? Stand tall and walk proudly, remembering that you have value as a person. When you meet others, make direct contact and keep your handshake firm and friendly. Clearly state who you are and what you do.

　　Communication habits

　　Take a deep breath to project a firm voice. Avoid slang, and jargon, and vocal hesitations that can hinder effective communication. Use only the body movements and gestures necessary to make your point, no more. Learn how to write clearly and concisely.

　　[312 words]

　　行文點評

　　文章是總分結(jié)構(gòu)。第一段先說明發(fā)揮你的個人魅力的信念來源：你可以用自己的方式實現(xiàn)自己的目標(biāo)。接著作者從五個方面介紹個人魅力的通常表現(xiàn)，每個方面作者都指明了它對發(fā)揮個人魅力的重要性，以及如何做到這一點。

　　好文妙譯

　　以個人魅力交流

　　發(fā)揮你的個人魅力來源于這樣一個信念：即你可以用自己的方式實現(xiàn)自己的目標(biāo)。有影響力的人賦予他人力量并鼓勵他人公開表述自己的意見。發(fā)揮個人魅力通常體現(xiàn)在以下幾個方面：

　　威信

　　威信是內(nèi)在的信心，即堅信自己的技能和能力。它來自于內(nèi)心，來自于“我能做好那件事”、“我會成功”的態(tài)度。當(dāng)你維護你的權(quán)利，真誠地去尋求你的所需所想，并愿意為他人和自己做出奉獻的時候，這種態(tài)度就會外露出來。

　　自信

　　自信表現(xiàn)為積極、直率和誠實。它表達了一種自尊和尊重他人的意愿。通過自信，我們視自己的需求和權(quán)利與他人的需要和權(quán)利是平等的。一個自信的人通過影響、傾聽與討論來贏取他人自愿的合作。

　　親和力

　　一個有影響力的人是人際交往的大師。良好的人際交往會使你為人所知，使你周圍有一個高層次的人際關(guān)系網(wǎng)，從他們那里你可以給予或獲得支持與信息。把你自己想象成輪軸，周圍由關(guān)系的輻條環(huán)繞。

　　形象

　　你可以通過你的形象來施加影響力。你想象過自己具有極強的領(lǐng)導(dǎo)能力的形象嗎?站直，昂首挺胸地前進，記住，作為一個人你自身具有價值。當(dāng)你與他人會面時，要直接接觸，友好而有力地握手。清楚地表達你是誰，是做什么的。

　　交流習(xí)慣

　　深吸一口氣，說出堅定的話語，避免使用俚語、行話，說話不要吞吞吐吐，否則會影響有效的交流。在必要時使用身體語言和手勢，多則無益。要學(xué)會如何用筆頭清晰而簡潔地表達自己的思想感情。

　　詞匯斟酌

　　��trait n. 顯著的特點, 特性

　　��authority n. 權(quán)威, 威信, 權(quán)威人士

　　��radiate vt. 放射, 輻射, 傳播

　　��assert v. 斷言, 聲稱

　　��negotiate v. (與某人)商議, 談判, 磋商,

　　��accessibility n. 易接近, 可到達

　　��spoke n. 輻條

　　��slang n. 俚語

　　��jargon n. 行話

　　佳句臨摹

　�、佟咀⑨尅縝e consistent with一致，相符

　　【臨摹】What you said now is not consistent with what you said last week. 你現(xiàn)在說的話與你上星期說的話不相符。