牛牛幽默英語巧記六級(jí)單詞A部分（第一期）

Ass

When I please my boss, I am ass-kissing.
When my boss pleases his boss, he is co-operating.
當(dāng)我取悅我的老板時(shí)，我在拍馬屁；
當(dāng)我的老板取悅他的老板時(shí)，他是在合作。
注：當(dāng)你想說某人愛拍馬屁時(shí)，你可以藝術(shù)地說"你真善于和領(lǐng)導(dǎo)合作"。

Assassination

Assassination is the extreme form of censorship[新聞檢查]
暗殺是新聞檢查的極端形式。
注：如果某個(gè)報(bào)紙對(duì)新聞檢查不管不顧，就派人把報(bào)紙老板殺掉。

Assimilate

We are Microsoft. Resistance Is Futile[沒用的] You Will Be Assimilated.
我們是微軟，抵抗無濟(jì)于事，你們將被消化吸收。
注：模仿微軟說話的口氣，微軟對(duì)很多小的軟件公司不是兼并，就是消滅。

Astronaut

Student:I enrolled at this college to learn how to be an astronaut.
Professor: hummm. I thought you came here to take up space.
學(xué)生：我上這所學(xué)校是來學(xué)習(xí)怎樣成為一名宇航員。
教授：我還以為你來這是占空間來了。
注：教授的意思是這個(gè)學(xué)生除了占地方外，一無是處。

When does a boxer[拳擊手] look like an astronaut?
When he sees stars.
拳擊手什么時(shí)候象宇航員？
眼冒金星時(shí)。

Auction

Firefighter: Hey, Chief! There's a 1959 pumper truck being auctioned today. Let's buy it.
Fire chief: What in the world would we do with an old, broken-down fire truck?
Firefighter: Well, we could use it for false alarms!
消防隊(duì)員：嘿，頭兒，今天有一輛1959年的消防卡車要拍賣，我們買了吧。
隊(duì)長：一輛老破消防卡車有什么用？
消防隊(duì)員：誤報(bào)火警時(shí)我們用。

Autobiography

Janie: Mom, how old is our car?
Mom: About five years old, honey.
Janie: And what kind is it?
Mom: A station wagon. Why all the questions about the car?
Janie: My teacher told us to write our autobiography.
Janie：媽媽，我們家的汽車幾年了？
媽媽：大約5年里，寶貝。
JanieL：什么牌子？
媽媽：旅行車（？）為什么老問汽車？
Janie：老師要我們寫汽車傳記（自傳）。

Only when one has lost all curiosity about the future, has one reached the age to write an autobiography.
只有當(dāng)一個(gè)人完全失去了對(duì)將來的興趣，他就到了寫傳記的年齡了。
注：所以最好不要忙著寫傳記。

Avail

There are few sorrows, however poignant[刻骨銘心], in which a good income is of no avail.
不管多么刻骨銘心的悲傷，很少有收入增加后不減輕的。
注：如果鄰居被車撞得很重，你得了50萬賠償，你還會(huì)那么悲傷嗎？

Nicola: I've proposed to four different men without avail.
Nicholas: Next time, try wearing a veil.
Nicola：我向四個(gè)不同的男人求過婚都沒有成功。
Nicholas：下次，試著戴上面紗。
注：Without avail: 徒勞；Avail 與 a veil(面紗)

Awe

I thought I'd start things off with the "shock and awe" phase of the operation.
我認(rèn)為我們?cè)撻_始"震懾行動(dòng)"。
注：美國攻打阿富汗取名"震懾行動(dòng)"。如果不分場合亂用"震懾行動(dòng)"就有點(diǎn)兒好玩兒了。

Axis

Oh my God, the entire axis of boring is in there.
上帝啊，無聊中心在這兒！
注：模仿布什提出的邪惡中心: axis of vice